Anger is probably the most poorly handled emotion in our society. From time to time we, all experience this very powerful feeling. Some of the common causes of anger include frustration, hurt, annoyance, disappointment, harassment, and threats.  Knowing how to recognize anger and express it appropriately can help us to reach goals, handle problems, protect our health, and prevent violence.

There are several stages of physiological signs of anger; and, if we pay attention, our body will inform us of when we are angry. 
 

• A stimulus triggers emotion 
• Stress and muscular tension begins to build
• Adrenaline is released contributing to growing tension
• Breathing rate increases 
• Heartbeat accelerates 
• Blood pressure rises 
• There is now a body and mind "Fight or Flight" response 

Sometimes we are not aware of the changes in our body. Other ways to tell if we are angry is by paying attention to our behavior. If you find yourself honking your horn at traffic, if you feel agitated, or if you are not able to concentrate on your work like you want to, these are all ways of knowing that something is wrong. 

Can Anger have an effect on your health?

If you are bottling something up and you are not expressing that anger, you will experience some mental and/or physical symptoms, such as:
 

•  Headaches 
•  Gastrointestinal disorders 
•  Respiratory disorders 
•  Skin disorders 
•  Genito-urinary disorders 
•  Arthritis 
•  Disabilities of the nervous system 
•  Circulatory disorders 
•  Aggravation of existing physical symptoms 
•  Emotional disturbances 
•  Suicide 

Are there different types of anger?

There are at least two ways of experiencing anger. You can feel angry with yourself for something that you have done or not done, or you can be angry at someone or something else. For example, you can be angry at yourself for not having done as well as you wanted to do on an examination; for stubbing your toe while walking over a carpet; or you can be angry at a sales person that is not helping you or with a spouse of girlfriend/boyfriend as a result of an argument. 

What are some of the non-productive ways of coping with anger?

A non-productive way would be to bottle your feelings up. Keeping the anger inside results in being indirect and sarcastic. Many people fear hurting someone else’s feelings if they share angry feelings. By holding on to anger, the other person ends up feeling hurt and relationships are damaged. Having a lot of angry feelings that are pent up could lead to punitive kinds of behavior or resentment, directly or indirectly. People that you are involved with, a boyfriend of girlfriend or a spouse, know when you are angry. There are ways that you show it indirectly. And when you don’t express that anger directly to them, usually they resent it, and the frustration can cause people to withdraw from each other.

If I am not aware of my angry feelings, is there a way to learn more about them?

The following "steps" will help you learn about your angry feelings.

• Step 1. Be aware if something is going on where you are finding yourself agitated, if you are snapping at friends, if you’re not doing well in your academic work. You know something is wrong. Give yourself time, take a few moments, locate the source. 
• Step 2. Locate the source. Is it something you have or haven’t done? Is it something inside that is going on? Or is it the result of an interaction with a friend, boyfriend, girlfriend, spouse? 
• Step 3. Choose the right time and the right place to express that anger. If it is anger inside you and directed at yourself, then find a friend, a relative, a counselor, and check it out. Get it off your chest. If it is the result of an interaction with another person, then find the right time and the right place to deal with what is upsetting you.

How can I cope with anger without resorting to violence?
 

• Learn to talk about your feelings – if you're afraid to talk, or if you can't find the right words to describe what you're going through, find a trusted friend or adult to help you one-on-one. 
• Express yourself calmly – express criticism, disappointment, anger, or displeasure without losing your temper or fighting. Ask yourself if your response is safe and reasonable. The other person may not respond the way you want them to – they may not be willing to hear it.  The important thing to remember is – that is their responsibility. You only have the responsibility to tell them. 
• Listen to others - listen carefully and respond without getting upset when someone gives you negative feedback. Ask yourself if you can really see the other person's point of view. 
• Negotiate - work out your problems with someone else by looking at alternative solutions and compromises. 

Anger is a part of life, but you can free yourself from the cycle of violence by learning to talk about your feelings. Be strong. Be safe. Be cool.
 

* Sources for this information included the American Psychological Association and the University of Florida Counseling Center brochures